Wednesday, May 30, 2012

The following grocery store aisles/sections have become ridiculously overwhelming and are making me hate America:


How can we have WALLS of these products available for our choosing?  Why do we need a wall of these products?  Remember in olden times when the general store didn’t even know what yogurt was yet and cheese was something that took a week to make?  Those were the good old days when making a choice about simple food purchases took zero minutes because you only had fourteen cents to spend and ten of those cents were already going to be spent on tobacco for grandpap and penny candy for baby William who isn’t really a baby but since he is the youngest of four---five if Daisy hadn’ta gotten run over by the tractor—he’ll get called that until he’s a foot taller than a fence post.  

Olden days shopping still probably took 2 hours though because the horse ride into town probably was already 50 minutes long.  So, maybe it all evened out by now I guess on accounta technology.  Oh well.

My prediction for the future is that grocery stores will eventually be too small to house these four aisles because their volume will continue increasing.  This will lead to the birth of stores that only sell these four things.   Like, The Cereal Palace, Soup City, Cheese Whiz! and The Yogurt Hole.  I am only guessing what these stores might be called.  These are probably not going to be the actual names.  I should probably buy the websites for them anyway.  Just in case.  I could get rich, maybe.

In the future it will suck to have to drive across town to the cereal store and then back to the cheese store just to get cereal and cheese but it’s the price America will have to pay for wanting so many different types of dairy products and also breakfast food.  Stupid America.

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